No One Deserves Hate: Discrimination on the Subway

I walked down the stairs to the subway on Friday. I was on my way to see my friend Annie for lunch in Union Square, when I saw a woman yelling.

Her hair was tousled and unkempt, her clothes and backpack dirty. She was yelling. At first I thought she was just yelling in general, about the subway or something, but then I noticed that she was following a family as they went up the stairs.

I don't know how it started, but everyone on the platform was watching, and I was still on the stairs, creeping my way down slowly. The husband walked slowly and spoke back to the woman - distracting her as his wife held their child's hand and headed up the stairs.

The family quickly left and the woman followed them - yelling - and spat in their direction. At that point I was on the platform. Everyone still watching.

You can already tell that she was targeting them, trying to make her presence and feelings known. Just think, you and your family are traveling and someone comes and is very aggressive to you? What do you think would cause such a thing? In this case, it was clear discrimination.

What I didn't tell you, is that the family was Muslim. At least, that's what the angry woman thought. The wife was wearing a light blue hijab and the woman aggressively commented on it. The woman also said something along the lines of "people like you shouldn't be in this country."

Recently at FAIR, I have been looking at how Islam is portrayed in the media. I am not a specialist on religious studies or media, but in a class last semester I learned how the media over time has picked specific groups to, in lack of a better words, "call the bad guys" or consider "the other," meaning that they are not accepted. Media does this by portraying a group as unfavorable which prolongs discrimination. This happened with newspapers in the 1800's - 1900's that promoted lynchings and slavery. People fought against discrimination by creating their own newspapers, like The Liberator, in order to have an alternative voice.

We, the media, have such a great power; we shape society's ideas and ideologies, we inform and educate, and overall send a strong message.

Right now, commentators say intolerant things about practitioners of this religion, and all the while push ignorance and fear onto the public. "Our" message, is a message of hate.

On Friday, though, I saw this hate embody itself in a woman confronting a family on the subway.

I keep playing this scene in my head, and I wanted to jump into action on the platform.

One idea I had went like this: I would confront the angry woman and explain everything to her. The media is lying to you! This family didn't cause 9/11, it was extremists that many believe do not honor Allah. I would tell her that she is perpetuating hate that we are trying to overcome. We live in America and this country belongs to this family as much as it belongs to you and me. 

Probably not the best idea. It is very difficult to try to convince someone that what they are doing is wrong in a peaceful manner. One way to stop this hate is through education, but I am not particularly good at this. It's difficult for me to articulate ideas when under pressure.

I also hate to say this, but Michelle pointed it out last night when I told her about this situation. When traveling alone in NYC, my main priority should be to keep myself safe. Confronting this woman, who was very aggressive, would question my safety.

The second way I could have handled this is more realistic. I imagined myself going onto the side of the stairs that the family was on, and block the wife and child from the woman yelling at them. At the top of the stairs, ask them if they were alright and see if they needed anything. Then, I would head down, and the angry woman would probably recognize me and start yelling. I would tell her, "No one deserves hate, no one deserves to be discriminated against." Yes. That sounds very heroic - like a movie or advertisement, but I believe that statement is true.

But, no. I didn't do a thing. No one did anything, they just watched, shocked at what was happening and then everything just ended. People quietly discussed how weird that was and started talking about the musician sitting on the platform, as if nothing happened.

I saw them at the top of the stairs and watched. They were alright. Upset, but alright. And then they just walked away.

All I could think about was that family; what I should have done. Regret lingered with me all weekend. I knew that it only takes one person to get a group of bystanders to act, but I didn't have the courage at that moment. Now, I think the only way I can change this type of hate is by making sure my work does not promote it.